Esto Perpetua (Latin: Let it be forever)

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Questions and Ponderings

Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
Dr. Seuss

Well, we've all heard the saying be careful what you wish for it just might come true? As the few people who read this blog know I've been praying about the girls who live next door the younger one more specifically. I've come to call her Lil' Creepy because of her bad habit of peeking in any open window and just walking through any open door whenever she pleases. Lil' Creepy is becoming more and more of a fixture at our house. Her recent addition to my duties is dropping her silverware off in my sink for me to wash for her. I find this habit particularly annoying because I don't have a dish washer so any amount if extra dishes bugs me, especially when I or Dallas haven't eaten off it and the meal eaten with said utensil was supposed to be a semi date night. However, I digress :) This Saturday, Lil' Creepy was asking quite a few questions, some questions that I do not quite know how to answer. The questions are a little more tricky than I know how to answer because of her family life. They started out pretty simple Q1. "Why do you hang out with me so much?" A1. "Well, you're a nice kid, why wouldn't I hang out with you?" she then says "Because you're not even my mom and she hates me!" "I'm sure she doesn't hate you!" "Yeah she does, she said she does, to my face!" We had a conversation about that for a little while. She seems to have so many questions about everything in life, I really like how it makes me think. I have so much more freedom in answering her in a way because she doesn't ask from a point of view or in a combative way. She genuinely wants to know why or what is the reason I do things the way I do. She is seeking answers from one of the few adults in her life. Her paternal grandparents are in Canada where her dad is originally from and they don't have much contact with their maternal grandparents. They don't attend church except for a youth thing every Friday evening. Q2. How long did you and Dallas date before he asked you to marry him? A2. Well, um, it was one month before we decided we wanted to get married. And I got my ring the Monday before we got married." Q3."Whoa, whoa, whoa! What did you say!? Are you serious!?" A3. "Yes, I'm dead serious!" "Man, I wish that would happen to me." "You will have plenty of time for that when you're a little older. You really have a lot of other things that you need to be focusing on right now." and the conversation about life goals at the age of thirteen ensued. Q4. "How did you know that you wanted to marry Dallas?" A4. "When we first met I loved his smile, I met him at my church during a revival so I knew he had the same beliefs as me, when we actually went out he was a true gentleman, and most importantly we talked about *everything!" then we talked about this for a little while. Q5. "Do you ever cuss?" (Lil' Creepy tends to have a colourful vocabulary which she now mutters under her breath after I have had to warn her about said vocabulary. Oy vey!) A5. "No, I don't I have a large enough vocabulary I *do *not cuss and you shouldn't either. It's not a very lady like thing to do." "But, don't you ever like hurt yourself and just say it? I know you do!" "No, I don't. You hand out with me a lot, have you ever heard me?" "Well...No." Then she sat the quietly with a bewildered look on her face for a few minutes. I could tell she was thinking about what her next move would be. Which turns out, she decided on some more questions :) Q6. "Do you ever drink?" "Drink what? You mean alcohol?" "Yeah, like vodka?" A6. "No! We don't drink alcohol." "Why not?" "Because I'm a Christian, I'm saved and as a Christian I don't drink alcohol." "Have you ever drank?" "No, nor have I ever wanted to." "Never!? Never Ever!?" "No, never." there were some other questions regarding husband and wife relations and I just couldn't even believe it, I was like "You are thirteen years old! You do not even need to be concerned about these kinds of things yet!" She got a little giggly and I was shocked, speechless almost that that was on her mind. I wasn't even thinking about that at her age, the idea of even holding hands with some boy I found cute would have reduced me to a blushing mess! The part that concerns me the most is she has a boy that she "likes" and he "likes" and they are "going out". The fact that she's thinking about that and has a boyfriend that is fifteen worries me to no end. So, needless to say I have been wondering lately if I should rat her out to her mom. I mean, honestly if I was a mom I would want to know if my young daughter was talking to another woman about these things, to know what was going through her mind. Yet, I don't want her to not confide in me because I may be the only christian influence in her life. It's weird for me because her mom and dad aren't married and have lived together for nine years or so, they curse (not profusely but they do), and she said her dad drinks vodka (once again not often but they know he does every now and then). I'm not sure how I as a christian should handle the talks we're having without sounding like I'm bad mouthing her parents. I don't believe in sex before marriage or living together before marriage but her parents are doing both. I don't believe a person should cuss or drink alcohol but her parents do both. I did get to invite her to church with us and she said she wanted to go with us Sunday but they ended up going to the beach with their mom while their dad was fixing their water pump. So, keep praying with me please. I asked God to help me be better at talking to people about him. I know you people who know me don't believe this but I am really shy when meeting people, I don't like to open up at all. I good at getting to know but bad at getting known, if that makes any sense. At church we just celebrated our pastors thirty-third anniversary, it was so much fun. Then Monday we went out to their house on Deal Island and it was so fun! It has a great lot with tons of trees and shrubs, right down the road from a dock for fishing, only a few minutes away from another beach that has all kinds of shells and sea glass that washes up daily. We walked the beach and came home with a bad full of glass! The best part was that I found a piece of pottery from a dish that had been dumped out at sea that had painting on it, an old 1800's pottery piece! I was thrilled to say the least :) Last night there was planning session for our ladies meeting in May which was also a blast. We had less ladies but it was such fun to sit a chit chat and plan for the get together. We're going to be having quite a few other churches come to this and we'll have three lady speakers and two other ladies and I will sing specials (I'm prolly gonna die) And we'll be serving breakfast and lunch. Fortunately I went with Mrs. Gina to the Sword of the Lord Ladies meeting in NJ in September of last year and it was a blast so I kind of know what is expected. I am bringing bagels, cream cheese, and juice for the breakfast and I'm in charge of decorating two tables for the lunch. Let me tell you, these are loooong tables! The theme of the lunch is Southern Hospitali "Tea". I know, I know, it's super funny to think of Maryland as being in the south but we are still south of the Mason-Dixon line! I'm still officially a southern girl! I figure I'm going to find some old hats and try to find some old gloves and some beads that look like pearls to put on my table :) I can't wait, apart from the nervous tummy from having to sing in front of a bunch of ladies who prolly sing a lot better than me the whole day sounds like it will be just such a blessing. I look forward to the other meetings and continuing to get to know my church ladies and being active in our church. That's all for now gals so please keep me in your prayers, I love you all :-*

You know children are growing up when they start asking questions that have answers.
John J. Plomp

1 comment:

  1. Wow, it takes you a while between posts, but you really dump a load when you do! You def. have your hands full with Lil' Missy. Kinda makes your family growing up seem a little more normal, huh? So sad that the child is so lacking and warped in a sort. Just keep praying, but by all means keep your doors locked! Make sure D does too if you are not home, I'd be afraid she has an obsession with him, maybe I'm wrong though. Have you talked to your Pastor's wife about her? Maybe some of the people at your church could visit her family on visitation. Anyway, I hope you have a wonderful time at the Ladies meeting in May! Love you and am very proud of you. You should have heard Dad's testimony Sunday night about "his girls and their lives". You would have smiled.