A Mother Always Has To Think Twice

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.
Sophia Loren

Being a full time mom is one of the highest salaried jobs... since the payment is pure love.
Mildred B. Vermont

Hey guys, long time no write :) It's been twelve weeks since my little girl made her debut into the world. It started out kinda rough but we're slowly but surely learning how to make her happy. She is getting better about car rides, sleeping, eating, and just generally being happier girl. It's nice to see that she is a happy baby. She is getting settled into a nighttime schedule so I have a little alone time to spend with Dallas. It was definitely a rough transition for him to go from the only one getting my attention to having to share me, even if it is with a tiny little screamer :) Now that we've got time in the morning and time at night things feel a ton better. I knew we'd be preoccupied with the baby but it didn't hit me how little time we'd have together. So now we definitely are making a point to have a solo date night at least every other week. I'm so thankful for good people from church that are willing and actually dying to watch Charlotte for us so I'm not stressed out about her. It's so nice to get out just Dallas and I even if it only ends up being two or three hours. I love having that time to just be together and not have to do nything other than focus on him. Charlotte is so sweet and getting happier the bigger she gets. She smiles so much and tries to talk to us already. All she's really able to say right now is "Ahgoo" and "Ahhhhh" but when she gets really upset and she's crying she'll break out the "Maaaamaaaa!!!" and it just rips my heart out :) She's also learning to make a super poochy lip too, is it wrong that I find it incredibly cute? It's gotten a lot better being at home all the time too. It just took some adjusting to go from going all the time to being home all the time. SO now my priorities prayer wise are for things to keep going well and to get us down south again. We really love our little house and piece of land but it is just way too far from family. I' praying that Eglin opens up and we can get a position there or even Pensacola. I just am dying to get closer to my family. As frustrating as the situation is I am trying to stay patient so if this is the Lord trying to teach me to be patient I can get my passing grade and head home :) Otherwise we're here til He lets us go, until then I'll try and keep everyone updated :) Love you all keep us in your prayers :)

Motherhood changed me because it is so fundamental what you're doing for another person. And you are able to do even though it takes a lot.
Meg Ryan

4/18/2011

Pictures for Auntie Shauna :)

Small And Brand New

Ten fingers, Ten toes
She's laughter and teardrops
So small and brand new
And amazingly angelic
She's sent to bless you
She's one special Baby
The best of life's treasure
And will grant and bless you
Many hours of great pleasure.
Author Unknown

She's here! Baby Charlotte Jane came into the world on March 29, 2011. She made her entrance at 2:56pm weighing 8.2 lbs and 20 3/4 in long. I still don't know how she crammed up inside of 5'5'' me, but, she did and she is gorgeous :) It started monday the 28th after I'd gone for my regular check up. We got there early, 9:30am so as hopefully be seen on time since I was due to work at 11am. They weighed me and checked my BP on time and shorty escorted us to a room, where we waited for over 2 hours to be seen. When the doctor finally came in we saw her for all of 30 seconds and were basically told that they'd be seeing us next week and they'd discuss inductions. I was shocked and angry, 1. that she'd not updated me on my progress like effacement or dilation and 2. that we'd waited that long and she didn't even ask me if we had any questions. After we left I made it to work 30min late and was feeling extremely uncomfortable. At one point I had to leave the teller line because I was so uncomfortable and in pain. The girls at work were saying that I was going to go into labor in the next few days. I have had the 29th in my mind for the longest time, it was really funny like a premonition. Well, I worked and went home and took it easy I just felt bad, like pressure down there. Then after Dallas got home from class I decided to jump in the shower to help me feel better. I felt a little better and got in bed and we slept. I woke up at 2:30am and felt a stomach cramp. I thought maybe I needed to go to the bathroom, well, I got back in bed and I noticed that they were coming exactly 5min apart. I didn't want to wake Dallas up if there was nothing going on and when he rolled over at 4:15am I said "Are you awake?" "Yeah, why?" "I think I'm having contractions." "What!? Really?" So, we timed the and they were every five min and lasted about one min a piece. So we decided that I should call my mom and see what she had to say. She said we should definitely call to see if the hospital would get us in for a check to see what I was doing as far as labor progression. So we loaded up the car and headed out. We got to the hospital and they checked e and said I was definitely in labor and was 80% effaced and 3cm dilated. They got us settled in a room and there we waited. As the day went on I got sick twice, which was weird, I didn't know that happened and I got the epidural at 5cm. Once again we were waiting but with the contractions gone it was actually fine. Then about 2pm the doctor came in and said he thought I needed a c-section. I thought for sure he meant later on that day and then he says "So, let me know what you think so we can get things started." I said "You mean like now?" and then he just said that we could wait since the baby wasn't in distress but that it would just prove the point that I needed one to have her. So I said "You're the doctor" and they started prepping me for surgery. As they were rolling me back I was so scared and the tips of my fingers went numb and my head got very light. I prayed that God would help me to calm down because I was feeling like I was going to pass out and I wanted to be awake to hear her first cry and see if she had hair all the first things Mom's want to know when Babies make their debuts. So, long story short she was born at 2:56pm and Dallas did such a great job he was so supportive and even starved while I had to starve :) I kept begging him to get food but he didn't want to eat while I couldn't. He's been the biggest help and to see him with the baby, how much he loves her and me. It just melts my heart. I was also really happy because my mom got to come and stay the week with us. She cooked and cleaned and helped with Charlotte and basically was the best mom a girl could have asked for. I a very sad that she had to leave today, it really broke my heart and I've been crying off and on. I' trying to hold it in til Charlotte is asleep because this isn't anything to do with her so I don't want her to see me. I am also wishing that the weather would war up already. I am going to go stir crazy inside all day. I can't wait to get out into the sunshine. Since I had the c-section I can't drive for two weeks, and outside is really the only place I can go for another week by myself. I was able to be active right up til her delivery so this being still stuff is stinking! I feel like I'm locked in my living room. That's where it's easiest to rock her and nurse her and pump basically I live in the living room! I am very grateful that she at least seems to sleep pretty well at night. We had one night that she didn't sleep well and I didn't sleep at all except for maybe three under ten minute cat naps. So, Kara comes in Friday and it will be great to have company again. I just wish it was during the week when I'm here alone. It really really hit me how much I wish I was close to my family. I mean, we've been applying everywhere fro GA-NWFl and nothings been offered yet. I wish I was closer so all of the babies firsts could be shared and I wouldn't feel so overwhelmed. I just feel like as much as I know, I know nothing. It will also be nice when she's a little older and can keep me company. So anyways today is her One Week Birthday :) We love her so much and know it only gets better! Thanks for all your prayers and please please keep me in your prayers as I really need them right now.

A babe in the house is a well-spring of pleasure, a messenger of peace and love, a resting place for innocence on earth, a link between angels and men.
Martin Fraquhar Tupper

The Oil That Eases Friction

In family life, love is the oil that eases friction, the cement that binds closer together, and the music that brings harmony.
Eva Burrows

The real question isn't whether or not you love your kids, but how well you are able to demonstrate your love and caring so that your children really feel loved.
Stephanie Marston

15 days! I cannot believe it's only 15 days til little miss Charlotte is said to be due to make her grand entrance into our world! I have the nursery set up and the swing, the high chair, the little bed in our room. Her clothes are all washed and folded and I'm planning my return to pre-pregnancy fashion :) I can't wait to be able to breathe again and get up from sitting a short time and not feeling like my back is made of porcelain. I will miss feeling her move in my tummy, that is quite an indescribable feeling. It's not even something I can explain when people ask how it feels. It's not butterflies, never has been, it feels like a person in there trying to get comfortable. I remind myself that no matter how uncomfortable I am she is infinitely more so than I can even imagine. I know she doesn't know any different than her current surroundings but it makes me less apt to whine ;) I am also excited because Mom and Kara are definitely coming to see Charlotte and I'm praying the Lord will open the appropriate financial doors that everyone can come see her. Then in November I'll get to celebrate my birthday and Kara's wedding all in one weekend! What a great time that will be! Not too much has been going on other than getting the final things ready for the baby. I'm still working and last doctors appointment I hadn't gained any weight :) I was sure glad to see that. I think what I had gained is sufficient ;) Ha ha, well keep us in your prayers please! She'll be here anytime now!


In truth a family is what you make it. It is made strong, not by number of heads counted at the dinner table, but by the rituals you help family members create, by the memories you share, by the commitment of time, caring, and love you show to one another, and by the hopes for the future you have as individuals and as a unit.
Marge Kennedy

The Future Worth Living For

A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.
Author Unknown


"I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.”"
Anonymous

We're on the end side of this mountain called pregnancy :) I've been feeling pretty good lately I have my achey days here and there. As long as I can sleep I don't feel too bad but when I don't, OY! I feel like a beaten up monster. I've also started having an issue where my hands fall asleep in the night and ache in the morning when I wake up. Come to find out it's Carpal Tunnel Syndrome brought on by pregnancy! That was a new one for me, I did not know that could happen! Then at work we lost a couple girls so my schedule has gotten changed up. I hate the hours because while it's nice to getting off at 1:30 I don't get to see Dallas really at all on monday, tuesday, or wednesday. It's really bad, I'm so spoiled with getting to spend most of my days with him and now I feel like I barely see him again. I know I'm whining, I am just spoiled :) It will be really nice to have Charlotte here to hang out with me instead of on nights like tonight where Dallas works for nine hours and I'm here alone, I'll have her to keep me company. Anyways, I'm glad to be almost done and be back to normal! I'm not a fan of the weirdness of the big tummy that is so cumbersome. It will be worth it all once she's here.



"Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning."
Anonymous

The End

“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.”
T.S. Elliot

“Every day is a fresh beginning, Every morn is the world made new”
Sarah Chauncey Woolsey


It's the new year and by golly we're halfway through January all ready! Can someone slow down the time a little please? We are now in our third trimester officially :) It's almost down to ten weeks before our little girl makes her debut into the world. We've been pretty busy with getting the holidays done, traveling, and planning for Charlotte. Fortunately everything is going according to plan so far and the weight is on track. I'm hoping to be able to keep the gain reasonable so that it won't be too hard to get off before Kara's wedding in November. I think that's a fairly reasonable goal, to be at least at my 10 week baby weight of 155. My ideal is around 140 but, I'm not going to stress about it. I just don't want it to be completely obvious that I just had my baby a few months prior. I am very thankful for the fact that I am married to a man who loves my pregnancy shape and never fails to tell me how gorgeous he thinks I am. It's really helpful because even though I don't feel ginormous or ugly it is so nice to hear that the man you find most attractive still thinks you're the most attractive. We get to lay in bed at night and watch little Charlotte going crazy in my tummy. It's funny because she's most active in the morning when I wake up and when I lay down in bed at the end of the day. She lets me sleep well at night (between trips to the bathroom) and even nap when I can get myself to sleep. I dreamed last night that she was born and probably about three months old and she had wispy red hair :) I love to dream about how she looks. She normally has dark hair like my little sisters did, last night she took after her Daddy's side. I've yet to dream she's white blonde, that's really taking after her Daddy. He was the Whitest haired little boy I've ever seen. Anyways, we'll be preparing stuff for the hospital stay before long. Dallas wants to make a run to the hospital and find the maternity ward soon. He is very much wanting to have that planned so he won't freak out once I do go into labor. Thank God we don't live more that 5-10min from the hospital, in traffic no less. So, I'm not too concerned but it will ease his mind to know. I guess that comes from his years as a military man. I'll try to post some pics of the babies room sometime soon. We've put off setting it completely up until it's closer, so it's almost that time. I find it hard to believe! Reality struck when the doctor told me Monday "Well, We will be seeing you back in two weeks then" and it hit me that that means that we're right there at the end! It means we've hit the last ten weeks! So, even if she goes lat we've got at the most 11-12 weeks before we're honest to goodness practicing parents! I can't wait but at the same time it's kind of scary. Thank God I've got a man I can totally trust and rely on to be a great man and a loving Father and Husband and has wanted this his whole life. He can't wait to try out being a Daddy and teach her things. We were at Lowe's the other day and passed the rug section. He just so happened to notice a city scape rug. His eye's lit up because he's been wanting one for her to play with but the only ones we were finding were large and expensive. This one had roads, buildings, a farm, school, and of course an airport complete with runway. He was so excited that he scooped it up before he even checked the price. I was happy that it was $19.99 because Charlotte was going to have that rug no matter what :) As we were carrying it up to pay he tells me "I'm going to teach Charlotte how to do Air Traffic!" and it made me smile. He's so eager to teach her things and I couldn't be happier to watch him show her the world. So, that's all for now friends please keep us in your prayers as we're nearing the home stretch!

"From quiet homes and first beginning, Out to the undiscovered ends, There's nothing worth the wear of winning, But laughter and the love of friends."
Hilaire Belloc